resolutions and goals

I've given quite a bit of thought to this year's New Year's Resolution. If you remember, for 2006 I chose a resolution for every month, and wound up burnt out halfway through the year and a little depressed from focusing so constantly on all the things that were wrong with my life. Then in 2007, I chose to focus on only one thing: being happy with my life the way it is. Which was a nice reset, and arguably something I still have to work on, but doesn't seem specific enough.

So this year, I have two resolutions - things that I expect by this time next year I will have made a real alteration in - and a few other goals - things I would like to make a priority but aren't as necessary.

Resolution #1 - work to create a more enjoyable intimate life (ahem) with my better half. He deserves it.

Resolution #2 - by this time next year, have a manuscript ready to start shopping around to agents.

Goals:

- write 500 words daily
- run 5 times a week, with stretching and working out 2-3 times a week
- pay attention to and work on improving my diet
- spend more time playing with my children and less time yelling at them
- maintain a consistent level of organization
- adhere to a strict budget guideline
- make new friends, keep up with the old ones
- don't buy any more new books until 2009! (at which point hopefully my TBR stack will be significantly shrunk)
- read more! veg out on computer/TV less!

And, finally, Be Happy.

thank you, Alton!

Today, an open letter to Alton Brown, the Geek's God of Cooking. I wanted to say thank you for having a show that made cooking and food-related topics a subject of interest to my other half:

Thank you for my kitchen, which has been upgraded in every appliance to "Alton-approved" brands and styles.

Thank you for my weekend mornings (and some weekday evenings), when I am regaled with tasty pancakes and waffles based on Alton recipes.

Thank you for the roasts, the turkeys, and the general cooking know-how that has added such flavor to our life.

Thank you, oh so very very much, for the chocolate-peppermint pinwheels that our entire family looks forward to every holiday.

Now, can you please do a show on how to find things in your kitchen (especially the refrigerator)?

it was the best of times, it was the worst of times

I was thinking last night about some of the best and worst times of my life. At first, I was surprised that it was so much easier to define the worst than the best. But then I thought about it and of course it's that way. Because the worst times tend to be associated with an event, something drastic that sticks out in my mind, while the best times are more eras than moments. So, some of my bests and worsts:

(We'll start with the worsts so as not to dwell on them.)

- the week after Lou had his heart attack in 2004. I was terrified, torn between my duties to my kids and my need to be with my husband, miserably sick myself. It was awful.

- losing Matthew. No need to elaborate there.

- incidents associated with my mother's alcoholism. I won't go into them because I'm trying hard to forgive/forget, but many of them are unforgettable and still as painful as the day they happened.

That said, on to the bests (in no particular order)!

- Veronica's birth. The birth was beautiful and nearly pain-free, our family was complete, and we had our much-longed-for little girl!

- my first semester of college. The friendships, New York City, my awesome job at Coliseum Books ... it was the stuff movies are made about.

- the years I was 9 and 10. Parents together, living in my beloved house, plenty of time for play, my mom wasn't yet too deep in the bottle - we were all pretty happy.

- 2006. I was loving having three great kids, in the best shape of my life, changed my name, had lots of friends, a good job.

Best of all, really? Is right now. New house, the ability to really try and put down roots, Lou with a job that he loves, the kids getting older and more able to do things, I've had my breast reduction, we're done having babies, and the rest of my life lays before me, ready to be written. Who could ask for anything more?

quiet Christmas Eve

This is our first with-kids Christmas that's just us - no out-of-town visitors this year. I'm looking forward to a quiet, peaceful, happy week with both the boys off school. We're hoping to catch up with the old playgroup (or members thereof) sometime this week, and the neighbors across the street are home and available for play, as well. We were restrained on gifts this year, so hopefully they'll enjoy playing with what they get without being too overwhelmed.

And here we are (mostly) settled into our new house, surrounded by beautiful snow-covered trees. As an extra Christmas bonus, the ice is melting off the driveway for the first time this month! It's so strange to live in such a rural area - no street lights, no ambient lights at all. You look out the window at bedtime and you can really understand what Clement C. Moore meant when he wrote "The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow gave a luster like midday to objects below." You look around for the light source, sure that there must be an electric light somewhere.

Everyone in the family is happy and healthy and looking forward to a good, starchy dinner later and a few presents before bed!

first of the year

This is something I saw on another blog: the first sentence of the blog for each month of the year. Might be interesting, so here goes!

January: I strongly considered doing another month-by-month set of resolutions this year.

February: I consider myself an orderly person.

March: Over the course of the last couple of months, I've reread many of the Montgomerys on my shelf.

April: 10 days, 9 nights, solidly on the road.

May: I think I may have lost count of the BR [book review] numbers at some point!

June: Today, I list things off because I genuinely am happy ... instead of, as on so many Mondays, needing to list off things to make me so!

July: Sorry about the posting gap - it's been a busy couple of weeks.

August: I'll admit, this summer has been fairly stressful.

September: Wow, I had no idea it had been so long since I'd posted!

October: Finishing up the story of my weekend!

November: Today's MOPS was a bit of a mishmash of topics - the speaker, the video, and the discussion questions all seemed to be talking on different topics, all related to the ways we use our homes.

December: Here we are, two weeks out from completing our change of house!

What can you tell from my year's worth of opening sentences? Let's see ... I don't blog often enough; I use way too many exclamation points; and my opening sentences are pretty boring. All three things to think about and work on in my blogging for the next year.

Laura Ingalls Wilder

I've been on a big rereading kick recently, and have included several of my favorite Little House books: Farmer Boy, The Long Winter, and now Little Town on the Prairie, with These Happy Golden Years in the bullpen. Additionally, I read the Little House Cookbook, written in the '70s by a woman who made it her business to make (as realistically as possible with modern implements) many of the recipes mentioned in the books. She continually pointed out Laura's rich and detailed descriptions of all sorts of foods (especially in Farmer Boy - never read that one on an empty stomach!) and made the point that during much of Laura's childhood the food options were limited at best, positing that the meals described were the sometimes wistful focal points of a youth spent often very hungry. I've noticed, as well, that it isn't just the food. The beautiful clothes of Laura's youth, the nice things she saw and owned and used, all the little things that added grace to her life, are lovingly described in every detail. It does read very much like the story of a girl who always felt that the beautiful things in life were out of her reach, and who very much wanted those beautiful things.

Maybe that's why they have such universal appeal: they are a wonderful reminder that the love of nice things, the longing to be better looking, the deep inner struggles between what a person wants and what is best, the continual striving to be a better person are not just inventions of today. They were there yesterday, and they will be there tomorrow.

readjustment

I have to say, I used to be quite experienced at moving to a new place. But of course, that was back when "moving" meant throwing a bunch of stuff into a car and taking a drive. No need for a truck, no real concern about things like utilities and mail delivery, and my social life was all on the computer anyway, so my perennial social ineptness wasn't so much an issue.

This time around, things are a bit different. And I find myself running into challenges that I wasn't expecting.

There's the mundane, like the ongoing issue of how to get the various mail carriers to place our packages somewhere safe that we'll a) see them before the snow soaks in and b) not run over them. The annoying, like the driveway that, once iced over, is apparently going to require full summer (and certainly not two major snowstorms) to be entirely clear.

And the same ol', same ol': friends. Only now, it's not just me who needs friends. I have to start recreating the entire web of relationships that provide my kids their socializing, as well. Over the last 5+ years, I've learned a lot about relationships between between women in specific and friendship in general. Key among the things I've learned: not to take things too personally. And to accept that these things take time. People I didn't think I'd like when I met them became people I hope to call 'friend' for the rest of my life. Wouldn't have happened if I'd listened to my first impressions.

So it's a slow process and requires a fair amount of work. You know when a bad time is for it? Right before the holidays during snowstorms and a serious cold snap. Fortunately there's school to help keep the kids entertained, and over the holidays I just have to look for gatherings of moms/kids where I can find them.

first post-move blog!

Here we are, two weeks out from completing our change of house! Finally I'm feeling like I have things in hand enough to make my own projects a priority.

Things I'm working on right now include:

- developing and maintaining a cleaning/laundry schedule
- getting my family to eat at the table; creating a family dinner time; and getting my children to start broadening their food tastes
- getting back into the habit of running/stretching/exercising
- developing relationships with other moms and kids in the area
- making writing/blogging a regular part of my daily routine
- unpacking in an organized, relaxed fashion
- and the standard: getting three kids from morning to night happy, healthy, well-fed, and educated

Not to be trite, it feels like planting a tree. Digging in, working on putting down roots, creating the basis for a long and healthy growing period. For them, for me.

I need a nap.