social styles

I think I've noted before that I find my children's differences and similarities (both from/to each other and us and previous generations) fascinating. One difference I have noted between my two boys is the way they approach their peers.

For example, at the end of his last year of preschool, Charles was still referring to some of his classmates as "... you know, that boy ... the one with the tall brother?" Greyson, at the same point of his life, knew everyone ... even the girls. Now, you might think this is just a difference in their ability to remember names (and it might be ... although Charles can remember the name of every centaur he's ever heard about, so I somehow doubt it). But I think it's really a difference in the necessity of other people in their little brains. For the same reason that Charles can spend hours by himself playing with just his toys and Greyson can be surrounded by every electronic game device (and several nonelectronic) known to man and still has to come talk to me every 10 minutes I think Charles finds other kids useful to be around at the time he's around them, and then stops thinking about them as soon as he isn't with them anymore. For Greyson, it's much more important to have people in the world he can label "friend" - it provides him a sense of security. Charles labels people "friend" whom he's never met before and then promptly forgets who they are once he's done playing with them.

I have no idea where Veronica is likely to fall in this spectrum. She gushes with awed pleasure whenever she talks about "my friends" or "my playgroup", but I think that's as much the pride of having friends and playgroup of her own as it is any interest in the individuals. They're only just getting to the age where they recognize each other and want to play together.

I'll be interested to see if the boys' friendship styles grow towards each other or if they remain different as they get older - and especially as Charles goes off to Kindergarten in Greyson's school, where Greyson is the 'leader'.